A message to share -

To my extended vaishnava family,

The month of April was quite an ordeal for me physically and mentally as I had to preapre myself for my knee-surgery (complete knee replacement). I have endured this pain for last fourteen years to come to this decision. Although I have to take more pain going through the surgery it will help me to get rid of everyday struggle and I will come back as good as new – that’s what the prognosis is and that’s what I am hoping for.

So here I am, as Advitiya to some, as Malika to others, as pishima to Ananga, as kakima to Dasanudas - I am going to miss you all for quite sometime. Unfortunately, they are not going to bring me a laptop in the rehab center! But I ‘m taking Guru-tattva-vijJAna and Raga-vartma-candrika with me. Forgive me Gaurasundara, for not being able to resume that topic. It was very hectic for me with too many appointments at the hospital. Hopefully your question will be answered. You and Madanmohanji keep sharing the nectar through padavalis. They are really beautiful.

I solely depend on Mahaprabhu’s mercy along with your thoughts so that I can go through this critical time and become fit to go on pilgrimages. Hopefully I will be blessed enough to be on my feet to go to Vrindavan some day and do parikrama around Giri-Govardhana which is my utmost desire. And of course, I need the Eyes (pure vision) too to have darshan of RAdhA-zyAmasundar.

saMsAra-maru-kAntAra-nistAra-karaNa-kSamau |
zlAghyau tAv eva caraNau yau hares tIrtha-gAminau || (B.R.S 133)

The two legs that walk to the places of pilgrimage associated with Lord Hari become means of crossing the desert of this world and are praiseworthy.

My goodness. I wish all the success for your operation and speedy recovery. When are you going in, again?

Do you think you'll have a DVD player at your disposal somewhere there? I could send you a set of video footage from our last trip as soon as I get it mastered. How long do you expect to stay in rehab?

Dear Madhava, I didn't think I would get such a quick response. I was still on-line.
Yes, I am going in tomorrow. No idea about rehab facilities. Somehow I will try to enter into Shrivas Angan and let you know before any kazi comes and stops me.

Among my devotee friends someone said, "I'll come and make an altar for you", while others are saying, "we will come over there and throw a kirtan".

Haribol!

Go and come back quickly. Do not worry Nitai Chand will be always there with you. So be happy.

Jay Nitai

I really wish all the best for you!
Shall Lord bless you for a quickly recover!

Radhe!

Radhe Radhe!

We will all be thinking of you and wishing you a speedy recovery.

Rasaraja dasa

Yes, best wishes to you, our dear Malika, for a successful operation and a speedy recovery. By the mercy of Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu knees will be mended so the sweetest of journeys can be undertaken without too much distraction.

We are still hoping to make it up there soon and hope to see you but our vahana needs its own operation so we don't have a date set just yet.

Jaya Sri Nitai-Gaurahari! Jaya Sri Radhe!

Mallikaji, I'm afraid that I completely forgot about those questions!

But I am sorry to hear about your knee problems, but see what a nice sentiment you have. Just like in Bhagavata, Ambarish Maharaja used all of his tools and faculties in Bhagavat-seva, so of course Sri Gaurasundara will allow your knee problems to pass quickly just so you can make good use of it on Vraja-mandala-parikrama!

All the best for an extra-speedy recovery; your sastric expertise and nuggets of wisdom will be sorely missed for a while!

- Gaura

Yes, keep strong Advitiya-ji!
Keep strong!

Best wishes and solid recovery!

Malika Mataji

You are in my thoughts and prayers. We wish you the best in a speedy recovery!

I'm sure it will be over quickly, so have a quick recovery too and may lord Visnu who presides over the legs and the capacity to motion grant his auspiscious blessing.

pAdAvasya vinirbhinnau lokezo viSNurAvizat/
gatyA svAMsena puruSo yayA prAptaM prapadyate//

Further appeared on his person (the Cosmic Purusa) a pair of feet (legs); Lord Visnu, the supreme protector of the world, entered them along with his power, the faculty of locomotion, by means of which the jiva reaches the place he intends to visit.
Bhag 3,6,22

My wife and I went to visit Mallika in the hospital on Wednesday. She is recovering from the operation and will be staying in the orthopedic unit for a few more days. The operation has been a success, in that the chronic pain she was suffering has gone. It will take several months to work in the new knee, and she will probably have to get the other one done, but the prognosis looks good.

Oh great, thanks for the update! If and when you are in touch with her again, be sure to convey our best wishes to her. Will she be back home in a couple of days, then?

My sincere dandavats to each one of you…

I am so glad to be home. It has been too long away from my family. I just got back from the rehab center two days ago. I was sent to the rehab on the fifth day (6th May) of my surgery. Ah! Was I relieved! Believe me, the services at the hospital has gotten worst than you can imagine. Coming to rehab was like vacationing in pain. All of us were in various levels of pain and were equipped with wheelchairs, walkers and canes. We all were independent with our own medications, injections (Yes, I had to learn that too) and what not. We all were meeting in the cafeteria three times during our meals and tolerating pain through physiotherapy and exercise classes. Some days I started my day with walker but ended in wheelchair by the end of the day. But we all had to go through this torture of physio to be able to reach the goal which is to get 90 degree of bending the knee at least before one gets the notice of discharge. It pained me seeing some unfortunate cases where despite trying all sorts of therapy for months their knees just won’t bend. Let my thought be with them and for their recovery as well.

Due to Gaur-Nitai’s mercy, in my case, the worst is over without any complications! Soon I was graduated from wheelchair to the walker and now to the cane. But I am finding it difficult to establish the relationship between cane and me since I have returned home. Very often, my son is coming with the cane in hand to look for me where I am. But I surely need it when I need to use the computer since it’s in the basement and always remembering the specific mantra in the back of my mind, “the good one goes to heaven and the bad one goes to hell” while climbing up and down the stairs. Believe me, I was well taught in all the basic principles for the handicapped people during the stay in rehab. I am still in healing process. I have to do my exercises regularly to get back on my feet. It’s going to take at least 2-3 months for the full recovery.

By the time Jagat and his wife Anne came to see me at the hospital, the crucial period (48 hours) was over. The day before I was very sick and drugged because of morphine and by the end of the day I also needed a blood transfusion. By the way, it was my own blood which was drawn one week before the surgery. Luckily, they didn’t have to see me with all the tubes which were just taken off and I was just sent to another room. It was little messy at that time because I was just settling down but was I glad to see them, specially, right after the Sanskrit conference where I was supposed to participate as well.

I like to thank all of you for your concerns, well wishing and prayers.

Through my painful situation, while resting I couldn’t concentrate on guru-tattva or bhakta-tattva-vijJAnam. I am sorry to say this. Unfortunately those were too serious for me to handle that time. I felt some solace by reading “carita-sudha” in Bengali by Shri Ramdas babaji, which kept me in good sanga while listening to nAm-kIrtan using the headphones.

I remember one evening when I felt a Moment of Transcendence through listening to the kIrtan sung by Amar Pal, “Bhaja Gauranga, kaho Gauranga, laho Gauranger nAm re” which took me to the streets in Navadvip-Mayapur Dham and then comforted me while singing the line “Gauranga bhajile, Gauranga japile hoy duHkhera avasAn re” followed by the song “Jaya rAdhe, jaya rAdhe govinda, jaya rAdhe, jaya rAdhe” in the same morning tune. Then when it came to the song “jAgiyA laho kRSNa-nAm re jagad-vAsi”, it just took all my pain away. My bed was transformed into a swing and started to rock me back and forth with the nice rhythm and the nice melody. I opened my eyes very slowly to see if I was dreaming or it was really happening. I was still able to visualise the bed in its right place where it was and I was swinging diagonally. I closed my eyes to let it continue. My body was as light as feather, as if I was not existing but my consciousness was present fully in its pure state. With that state of mind I felt someone’s presence there. As I opened my eyes again very slowly to see who that was, he was a very dear devotee friend of mine standing there with Radha-Krishna’s Yugal picture situated in Om. That was it! I burst into tears. I cannot write anymore…

That was quite an experience!

Jaya Nitai! Jaya Gaurahari!

Radhe Radhe!

Welcome home and feel better soon!

Rasaraja dasa

Let me be the second to announce how dearly welcome you are back. Smooth recovery!

Welcome back.
All the best!

Tarunji

prItyASpadeSu
arogya lAbham Astu te

zrIvAsAGgana-bhakta-vRndAya dhanyavAdAH|

Arogya-lAbhAya bahudhA yatnavaty aham|

Advitiya mata,
I'm so glad to hear you are doing well. My brother just underwent knee surgery (due to a motorcycle accident), so I can at least understand somewhat the difficult recovery.

Wishing you the best!

Radhe Radhe!

Oh Radhe!

I 'm so sorry to hear that. I wish him the good recovery as well.