Request to all who sent me a PM - ...and didn't receive a reply yet

As you've all no doubt noticed, I'm back online. However I'm only borrowing Yugal's phone now and then, and it's painfully slow. I get an average speed of 1-2 KB/s.

Consequently, answering to PMs has become somewhat of an endeavor, as these pages are loading very slowly. I would therefore appreciate if everyone who PMd me and didn't receive a reply yet would send the PM to me as an e-mail. They are easy enough to download, and I can type my reply offline whenever convenient insted of depending on the times I have internet access. Please send them to: backlog at vrajajournal dot com. That'll make my life and the clearing of the backlog a lot easier.

They tell me the new tower here will be activated within the week, and my regular connection should be back in business, giving me a whooping 6-8 KB/s of speed which will cross the magical 5K limit and actually be tolerable to use.

You can find sent messages in your "Sent Items" folder. Please go there and copy & paste the messages waiting for a reply to an e-mail. Put them all into a single e-mail if you have several on the same theme.

Sorry to bother you all with this, but 98% of you currently have a smoother internet connection than I do. Bed without a matress -- that I can live with here in Vraja. One bucket of water for the bath -- just fine, you get used to it. However, a 1.4K internet connection makes me grind my teeth pretty loud.

I thought I was back online, anyway. It's been a bit of an on and off situation all the way through.

I am flying out today. My internet connection in Finland is scheduled to open on the 6th. I'll try and log in from somewhere prior to that, but I may not be around that frequently until then.

Nice to read that you are coming back. Have a safe trip, Madhava and Malatilata.

Have a safe fly to Finland, Madhava & Malatilata!

So, no more excuses after April 6. All the PM -s/e-mails will be answered. Right?

We all are anxiously waiting for your return.

Jay Radhe!

We returned to Finland last night, safe and sound though in gloomy moods. Where are all the Vaishnavas?

Yes, after the 6th all will be answered. However give me a week to clear it out, I have a massive load of things to sort out, both online and offline, on top of an interesting economical situation.

Welcome back, dear Madhava & Malati.
I can understand your shock after so much time at Sri Radhakund.

But at least many Vaishnavas think about you both and are thankful for all the
nectar you poured out (loaded up ) and will pour out...

Take your time with everything.

Best wishes
Tarun & Moni

Jai Radhe, Madhava.

Gloomy in Finland--gloomy here, too.
The sun has been shining and the snow melting,
but my heart is as heavy as Sysiphus' stone.

Should I roll it back to the peak of the hill
I will stand again above the clouds. But I fear
the Conspiracy of Gloom has me chained at the foot.

I am very glad that my Madhava and his dear Malati are back, as well as Jagatji. Now we can look forward to a great deal of good stuff!

Friends,

THE World is too much with us; late and soon,
Getting and spending, we lay waste our powers:
Little we see in Nature that is ours;
We have given our hearts away, a sordid boon!
This Sea that bares her bosom to the moon,
The winds that will be howling at all hours
And are up-gather'd now like sleeping flowers,
For this, for everything, we are out of tune;
It moves us not.—Great God! I'd rather be
A pagan suckled in a creed outworn,—
So might I, standing on this pleasant lea,
Have glimpses that would make me less forlorn;
Have sight of Proteus rising from the sea;
Or hear old Triton blow his wreathèd horn.

I am an ocean

I am an ocean : on the surface names and forms
ruffle and ripple like waves, tides and storms.
But sat, chit and ananda are my depths,
waters untroubled by virahas or deaths.

So listen : When I say that Krishna saves,
I do not mean he stops or stays the waves.
It means we meet him in the inner deep,
a holy realm beyond profoundest sleep.

I do not fear or shy from karma’s phal;
I do not seek freedom from my sins or hell.
The Name pulls me with infinite grace
To my deeps where They are e'er enlaced.

I am an ocean : on the surface names and forms
ruffle and ripple like waves, tides and storms.
But being, knowledge and love fill my depths:
Where no curse shall e'er trouble me, nor regrets.

To which I must add:

Waves too are the verses you have just read.
Why make these waves? What needed being said?
It's this: You too are an unfathomable sea,
So sink the horned hare, like me.