I Saw Santa Wearing Neck Beads - He wasn't kissing mommy

Passed the jolly old fat man on my way back from geosynchronous orbit. He must have been taking his sleigh for a test flight. He wasn't wearing his usual red - more of a light orange and had a bead bag in one hand while holding the reins in his other. Was that a bag full of Gitas in the back of his sleigh that I spied?

I heard he changed his name to Sanatana Claus.

I take it that the guru of the cosmos has chosen to bless our humble establishment with his graceful presence. By all means, enjoy your stay until the zodiac calls again.

I first saw Santa wearing neck beads more than 20 years ago. But I could never figure out why the planet's most famous toy-maker was standing OUTSIDE the Toys-R-Us building, begging for money... and with just a couple of days remaining until Christmas.

Although I saw his neck beads clearly, I'm quite sure that he didn't have any Gitas in his bag. He was quite insistent that he was NOT a Hare Krishna.

I wonder, though, whether Santa Claus is just a little too vaidhi-oriented for this forum. On the other hand, I am pretty sure that Dasya Claus, Vatsalya Claus or Madhurya Claus would be rasabhasa.

Maybe Sakhya Claus?

I've been here all along, in my Venusian siddha deha. I decided to teleport to a web portal to manifest a more corporeal avatar in cyberspace.

What's with all these humans decimating the pine forests at this time of year to sell trees in parking lots? This is nothing short of wholesale violence against a proud species, many of whom are chanting the kama gayatri I personally initiated them with. Your planet is very primitive. It may have to be quarantined for a while.

Still can't find a decent cigar at the mall. They all taste like crap. Oh well... I may have to take up smoking incense.

Hey, seriously speaking. I quit my fourth year of high school, just 6 months away from graduation to join the Hare Krishna movement at the age of 17 back in 1977. I ran away from home to join a life of singing songs, sastra studies, ect. Long and behold, two weeks into me joining the temple, I was strongly convinced (we had not much of a choice) that the highest service was to go out and dress like Santa Claus, distribute 'prasadam' candy canes and collect money on the street on the streets of Manhatten. It was so bewilderding the whole experience. Here I was, this little scrawny kid with a Santa outfit with a piilow underneath. Some people thought I was a girl Santa.

I knew one Hare Krishna fellow that was so bent on collecting money as Santa that he would start in November and go right up to Febuary, way after Christmas was over. Not only that, but he was doing in Puerto Rico with all that hot weather they have there. His white Santa beard he would put on everyday smelled really bad from wearing it months on end.

The most bizarre experience I had of Santa Claus was in 1975 in LA at the temple. It was the Christmas marathon. The Sankirtan leader had arranged the purchase of about 50 Santa Claus outfits for collectors to go out collecting in. Even I was a Santa Claus. After the morning program we all donned our Santa outfits and started to gather out in front of the temple.
As I stood there looking around I saw Santa Claus walking hither and thither. At one point there were Santa Clauses scattered all over the temple compound in LA. Everythwere I looked there was a Santa Claus coming or going. It was quite an amazing site. I would never have imagined that when I flew off to L.A. join the movement in March of 1975 I would be dressed up like Santa Claus and going to panhandle money in Downtown Burbank. There was a national skateboard competition going on in Downtown Burbank that day and there were rich kids, movie star kids and all sort of young people in downtown Burbank that day. I stood there for hours passing out candy canes and asking for donations for the "world relief campaign". I collected about $125 that day but I had to put up with a lot of people asking me why Santa Claus was begging for donations when he is supposed to be giving gifts to everybody.

It was quite a site that day to see all them Santas walking around the temple in L.A., like something out of a Hollywood comedy movie.

It was not too long after that that I "blooped" and went to the farm in Tennessee to try and find a more aesthetic lifetstyle in Krishna consciousness. L.A. was great and I am glad I joined the movement there, but I just couldn't handle the bizarre collection tactics and heavy pressure of working the airports in L.A. and Las Vegas. I was just a timid boy from a small town in the midwest. I couldn't really adjust to the pressure of book distribution. I just wanted to be a yogi. I didn't like the crazy ISKCON collection tactics that the big guns forced on us so that they would look good bringing a lot of money to Prabhupada, while we remained nobodies on the botton of the barrell.

I hear you Rasesh.

When I think of the good times I had in ISKCON it wasn't the 'high service' of collecting money but it was the nine limbs of devotion ie. Nama sankirtan, Deity worship, reciting stavas, reading the pastimes and teachings of the Bhagavata and Caitanya Caritamrta, and speaking about Krsna.