after reading the Second Wave of BRS by Srila Rupa Goswami, i got some really important revelations for my tiny spiritual life.
all the time i was raised in ISKCON/GM i was tought how IMPORTANT the aspects of RENUNCIATION and KNOWLEDGE are for
advancing in spiritual life.
i was forcing myself to get up early , forcing myself to take icecold shower, etc...
not knowing that this is HARDENING the heart if its done FOR YEARS (the forcing!).
actually, i felt like REBORN to read these lines:
BRS, Second Wave, text 248:
"In the beginning, knowledge and renunciation are a little useful for ENTERING the path of devotion; nonetheless, these two are
NOT ACCEPTED as practices of devotion."
" The saints generally believe, that knowledge and renunciation cause a HARDENING of the heart, whereas devotion is said
to be tender by nature."
so, time for a SOFTENING of my grizzly german heart!